If You Think This Is Easy..

1 11 2010

.. then you are a true fuckward.

We’re all 3 centimeters tall.
The box is as tall or as small as you let your mind see it.



I wish I was programmed to want the same things other girls wanted. I mean, don’t get me wrong, this chick has fantasies about the dream wedding, the perfect groom, the 3 kids (negotiable), the house, the family car and the fuck shit shenanigans. I write fictional stories about love. Fuck, some of them are even loosely based on my fuck up of a life about the coincidences I exaggerated to build a story someone would take time to read. My real life isn’t quite as interesting unfortunately. Only the tragedies are worth anything but who really wants to read a story with a stagnantly miserable plot? I wouldn’t.  Tragic I have but people want tragic endings. No one wants to read tragic middles. Or some love happy endings. I haven’t gotten to that part of life yet.

People dream about these things and they settle for whatever that’s just close enough. That’s the theme in life isn’t it? Close enough. Somewhere along the road, someone gave dreams a limit. They say it’s reality. I say it’s a cock fucking block.

If only I was programmed to be happy with whatever it is everyone has. Then maybe I can willingly strive for it. This path isn’t easy either but if you set your mind to achieving it, you’ll get there. People strive and work their balls off for things they want. I’m being told to strive for something I do not want hoping that when I reach the finish line, I’ll learn to like it. Why should I? There is nothing binding me to this. You can’t even call God on this because he doesn’t want this for me or else he wouldn’t drive me to the other direction. I didn’t sign up for this.

I’m sorry if this comes off as a little emo and depressing. Just got to know something amazing this morning that I’m suppose to feel proud of achieving but all I feel is guilty for not being ordinary. It’s ridiculous but this is my life.




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