He’s Just Not That Into Me…Or Is He?

16 11 2009

I have long discovered that I’m the RULE not the exception. For shizz, it’s true. But see, from the way *I* work, things have to be somewhat improvised. I like the challenge of striving for the impossible. Mediocre is boring. These few months have only proven that if i had enough confidence in myself, anything is fucking possible. My situation now is that people are actually starting to give a shit. Worst thing is, they’re not just.. ANYONE.

But how come I’m still chowing down this sinful fucking piece of heaven of a muffin covered in devilish fudge and chocolate chips? Why is this so real and not real at the same time? Life.

Okay sidetrack. My life hasn’t been at the best state. Family problems are popping left and right. Changes are to be expected. My journey to self discovery is making everyone around me panic (at the disco). Everyone including myself. I’m not the strongest person on the planet and I can be talked out of anything. I’ve been shaken by every doubt, I’m getting weaker with every person changing teams.

I’ve made mistakes. I’m making some as we speak but I’ll continue to make these mistakes if they’re actually leading me somewhere. Or at least, give me the experience and knowledge I need. Thanks for not believing in me. You counting on my failure is making me live so sincerely, thank you.

I’ve been kicked when I’m down and these past few weeks have just been horrible with little sugarcoats from a few people that are my little ray of clarity in the blizzard. (Mr Burger & Mr Gigantic Geek, thank you. I heart you.) But I’ll struggle on.

If it happens, it happens. If it makes you feel better, I’ll let you laugh in my face if it doesn’t.




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