Quarter Life Crisis

2 07 2009

I think everyone goes through a stage where they’re just unsure about the next step or what the future holds. I’ve been struggling with this since I was 18 years old and didn’t know whether I wanted to go back to school or start working. When I eventually made up my mind, the universe seemed to work well with me on it.

So 2 certificates later, I’m back here again. However this time, I know what I want. I want my advanced diploma. That’s for sure. But this time, the only thing different is my financial situation. I’m not gonna tell you how I managed to pay for my diploma because its something you just don’t brag about. I have no choice but to start working. The problem is, my parents don’t seem to understand that papers do matter. They want me to start working for a construction company (one that my brother was forced to go into also). I know they want the best for me but I’m just not up for working in a cubicle all my life. temporary is fine. Full time for a period of forever?

I’ve struggled so hard trying to find myself. Figuring out what I want to do with life is hard enough. Having pressure to work, not towards but away from my goal is not helping. I know what I want. I want to work as a media, for a media, publishing.. anything that revolves around this. If I have to be stuck in Singapore forever, I’d rather be stuck here doing something I don’t hate completely.

I guess it’s just all in the package of being the age I am now. Why has the quarter life crisis shifted to such an early age. I thought I’d only be losing sleep and sobbing over something like this when I’m 25 or older….

Its the longing for something. Something you want, but cannot have. Not for now anyway.

Is this why people get involved in seriously fucked up relationships at this age? Do I have to get into a sucky BGR situation to achieve some sort of distraction from this crisis?

I dont know…

From the way I see it, I’m royally fucked. But I’ll dig myself a hole in this eventually. Screw everyone, I’ll make it.

Fucked Up Shenenigans
Lyds – 1:07am

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